" Both women and men ... "

* * *

My wife does not give me the money to spend.And then a miracle happened: I won the lottery spinning, inflatable boat and fishing clothes.

* * *

wife turns to her husband:
- Honey, you buy me a carpet?
- Too much luxury!On a broomstick to fly ...!

* * *

- Your wife is very original earrings!
- Yes, I forgot to buy her a gift for the New Year.I had to give my cufflinks.

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Girls who write in the status "I have a hard to find, but easy to lose", somewhat similar to the socks.

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anyone!Explain to women that if you got drunk after an argument - that is, proof of love and spiritual experiences, not what you "drunk and dirty, indifferent beast."

* * *

- A girl and her mother-in-law not to your needs?
- No, she is not that dogryzla!

* * *

Wife:
- Is it true that all rodents stupid and greedy?
Husband:
- True, true, my mouse.

* * *

With the advent of unbreakable tableware family scandals have become longer.

* * *

With regard to gender equality - I belie

ve that the wife has the right to do whatever she wants.If only it was tasty.

* * *

girl asks her married friend:
- Why do you call her husband "male scientist?Is he really so smart?
- No, just that he always goes to the left, and thus also tells tales.

* * *

morning, her husband asks his wife:
- Look, what do you think when I came back at night with a black eye?
- Do not think.When you come back, the bruise was not yet ...

* * *

Kate and eating Whiskas, and tore up the wallpaper in the hallway, but her husband still called her a hippo, not a cat.

* * *

man comes and complains to a friend that his wife was at it all night screaming yesterday.
- Well, you must have again brought home no, - says one.
- Yes, yesterday I was all about sober!Sam came to his feet and hands.

* * *

woman differs from a man that thinks not every step, and walk in the whole ...

* * *

If the dispute with the girl you are armed with only logic and factscommon sense, you have no chance.

* * *

- All Men Are goats!
- Yes, dear.Everything.
- You, too?
- I'm the biggest asshole in the world!
- Then why I married you and live with you for so many years?
- And now we gradually moved on to the subject, that all women are fools.

* * *

- What in your village called women whose men do not drink?
- Yes, as elsewhere, the widows.

* * *

Dear girls, if the guy stops a computer game, to respond to your message - to marry him!