" Christmas smeshinki "

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31 December.Calls the child:

- Ale, an ambulance?Come soon.Our dad crazy: put on a red coat, boots and tells everyone that he is Santa Claus.

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January 1st.The "Time":

- Alarm message came to us from Yekaterinburg.According to our correspondent, the press secretary of the mayor's office, vodka in the city there are only two days ...

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31 December.A man puts a stool and throws a rope to the chandelier.Suddenly the door swings open and bursts drunk Santa Claus.He plops down on the sofa, looking at the poor guy and asks:

- What are you doing there?

- Yes, life - a nightmare, I can not more tired !!!I decided now ...

Santa Claus says:

- Hmm .. Well, if you're still on the stool, tell me something, poem ...

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January 1?.Food store.In the morning at the store in general there was no one ... and then pulled the children with the notes.

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husband and wife say to friends:

- Join us for the New Year!

- We can not

- Oh, how kind of you!

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And most of all I love the New Year for a sense of boundless space, which occurs after you threw the tree.

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- Sorry, you're the director-producer?

- Yes, I am, and what?

- Do not you think that this New Year's performance is very similar to last year's?

- What do you mean, last year the tree spun in the opposite direction!

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- And where did your Maiden?- Ask Santa Claus.

- Yes, she uttered so many compliments that she melted!

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Under the new year all coming true!Coming true, even what at other times it is impossible to sell.

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New Year's action from the spammer Vaska!You send him to address 10 of their friends, and it removes you from their database!

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At that moment, when you sit down just for New Year's table and lift the first glass, intuitively looking through the eyes of the option "Save as ...ยป

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New Year holidays:

-Honey, I have to buy bread!What to buy - red semi-sweet or dry white?

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- Dear Santa Claus!On New Year to give anything I do not need.Well, maybe, give me three cherries ... Put them, please, to the number of horizontal on the extreme left slot machine in the casino "Golden Ball".I'll be there all night.

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- Hello!How did you celebrate New Year?

- Yes, terrible: a gift under the tree awoke ...

- Well, what's wrong - as always Well because ... tradition ...

- Yes, but not in the middle of the forest!

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New Year's Eve 75% of men will sit down to bed early!

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- How was your New Year?

- That is how it was? !!!