What the blind, and loved

The common conventional wisdom that smart women get married for lieutenants and themselves make of them generals, did not come out of nowhere.Even men often agree that it is the woman independent of their successes, achievements, ups and downs ....The truth in this case they repeat the words of Flaubert, that "women inspire men to great deeds, but do not leave time for their performance."

In his youth every girl dreams about what her choice will consist solely of some merit.Beautiful, intelligent, courageous, independent, determined, cheerful and other, other, other ... Even at the threshold of the registrar many continue to believe that with such a person, they are now bind their lives.

Time passes, and illusions begin to fade, but a reality ceases to please.Near no handsome prince wakes up with you every morning, and the real, it is the man of the earth, which has a lot of flaws.And what to do?

Someone reconciled with fate, and sighing for dispel pink mist starts to get ground patiently, trying to

find as much good in her, now close, man.Others may not accept the self-deception and begin to break and remake a man, diligently trying to still create from it a handsome prince from girls' dreams.

What can end the second option, is easy to understand: if a man is docile, timid, sweet-tempered, lacking manners leader, a strong woman quickly break it and turn into a henpecked.At the same time it is unlikely to remain satisfied with the fruits of their own activities, but because the poor man is waiting for a hard life full of reproaches and lamentations of his wife, the way she was unlucky with her husband.And all the efforts of the men came to nothing lead - please frustrated woman is almost impossible.

But clever, wise woman, a closer look closely to the chosen one, may well develop in him the qualities that she liked or smooth shortcomings, its annoying.Attention, understanding, respect, and, of course, women love a man is able to transform into the hero of your novel.

So it turns out that if we believe in man, he tries his best to live up to its promise.And, on the contrary, constantly humiliating mistrust, we not only undermine his self-confidence, lowers self-esteem, but also call the spirit of resistance and the desire to make things worse, out of spite.

What to do?If your husband stars from the sky is not enough and does not seek to catch the bird of happiness by the tail, but not because he does not want to, but simply does not believe in their own strength, your job is to persuade, to prove to him that he is capable of much.

Not only women love the ears - men too accept everything they say women.So do not skimp on the praise, to underscore the strengths and successes, even if small.Just do not overdo it, otherwise it will look insincerity.And unjustified flattery and exaggeration of merit, you can turn a humble man in a notorious egotist.

Folk wisdom says that criticism and praise should be equal, only have faith in your words.And finally, if you were married to this man, really it does not have those advantages, which at one time you so attracted to him ?!You just do not get hung up on the flaws and not try them all the time to stress.

If you are a wise woman, then even if you have a stronger character than your husband, you will not emphasize this and to demonstrate their confidence and ability to solve all the problems either him alone, nor, especially, in front of strangers.On the other hand, you have the guts to seem weaker than you really are.Let him show and the power and the responsibility and the opportunity to be her husband, protector, breadwinner and support.Avoid mocking tones, jokes about him, even in private, not to mention the fact that you are surrounded by other people.Showed no doubt that he can handle some business and, even if not all at once it turns out, do not stress his ineptitude and inconsistency.

Very often women, from which leave their husbands, wondering: "What he did not have enough ?!The house is in order, the food is always prepared himself well-groomed, earning more than his, all the problems itself decide, and he has found some ... and ran into some slippers! "And he was just tired of being the thing that obihazhivat wife along with a refrigerator and carpet inliving room - most importantly, that was fine.He does not stand, that it is not considered, for holding worthless person.

The men caught in such a situation in his family to save themselves from complete humiliation, only one way out - to escape.And when he met the woman who would believe in him, he is in the full sense of the word will start a new life.There are many examples where alcoholics stopped drinking, withdrawing from family, or seemingly helpless loafers became successful, adventurous and have reached considerable heights.

That's what he said is one such former "loafer and sponger", and now a successful businessman, who owns a large fortune, "My wife I just smeared on the wall with his eyes.Do not have the strength and the desire not only to do something, but also to wash, dress - did not want to live.And this humiliation every day.She did not swear, do not grumble, but with the air of food served that a piece stuck in the throat.I'm secretly began drinking from it, to numb the pain inside.And I was not trying to start doing whatever came up with, she looked skeptical and condescending to say, they say, still you do not get ... And worst of all, the children began to look at me the same way. "

new girlfriend, now his second wife, was able to see in a man that did not want to see her predecessor, not only the strength and the ability to achieve something, but the desire of man to do it.It lacked only a small push and faith in him on the part of the loved one.And she was able to give him.Now, the first wife is biting his elbows, and her successful husband happy in her new family.

handsome prince in the world does not happen.It is only in fairy tales and girlish dreams they excite our imagination.So do not torture himself or his man - Know how to find the good in him and love him for it, and not the non-existent virtues.Help her husband become what you want it to, but not alter, mutilate, and support and inspire, though not on the deed, but Down and Out the trouble - the beginning!Together you roll up the mountain and achieve all about what dream!