Perhaps strange adult male (I am 29 years old) to write a letter to a women's magazine.But I hope I can help, prompt, how it is possible to change the position in which I find myself.
I must say - I love my mom.She raised me alone, without a father, I do not remember.He left my mother when she told him about the pregnancy.Left alone, my mother still gave birth to me and no longer tried to arrange his life, dedicating it to me.
Together with her grandmother, they raised me.How many can remember, Mom was always there: the lessons helped teach to all my affairs penetrated.We read together, we went to all sorts of excursions.She even got up on skates and skis, to teach me.
Of course, my mother worked hard to provide for our little family.I can not say that we have something needed.Luxury was not, but everything you need has always been.And she had me taken out on the sea, and all sorts of clubs were money.
And she never complained about his fate, never scolded my father and circumstances.On the contrary
When I graduated, my mother she offered me to move to my grandmother's apartment, which after her death got us.Then my mother said that I'm an adult, I have my own personal life, so should be and personal freedom.
seems everything is fine?What more could you want - good loving caring mother, a good job, his own apartment.But here is where the problems begin.Mom is committed to continue to go into all my affairs and concerns.She comes every day, cleans me, wash, cook, through all my stuff.Moreover, without a call comes.
One day she came in, when I had a bunch of friends - have noted an increase in the work.Fun curled once, because my mom sat down to the table and began to question everything.Another time she came, when I was a girl.Naturally, the girl immediately zasobiralas home.And so it happened more than once.On my word, that she even called, making a surprised look and clarifies what may be a secret from his mother ?!I say, as if I'm a woman in bed, and she calmly replied that she always has things in the kitchen.
mother still buys me clothes, and does so at his own taste.And all that I bought myself criticized and eventually just disappear from the cabinets.Explain to her that now is a very different fashion than it currently is, it is impossible.It dictates how I dress, how and what to eat, where to go, how to communicate, not realizing that I have grown up, adult, and I can be your own tastes.
She commented and interfere in all my relationships with friends and girls.Where I do not tknus - everywhere mum with their opinion, to the ready-made solutions, with discontent and resentment, if I act differently.
As for the girls, it is a special case - it simply no one like that!Several times I acquainted her with the girls he met, but ended it is always the same - my mother asked them a lot of uncomfortable questions about his parents, about housing, work, income, tastes, the attitude towards sex, and then fell silent, disapproving pursinglips, and before the end of dinner, tea or simply silent.
I tried to talk to her, to understand what is not liked.The answer is almost no different: this - flirt, one need Moscow residence permit, a third a pound of makeup on her face and a skirt, like a whore, fourth bezdelnitsa that just wants to sit on the neck, and so on.
And she keeps saying that I need to get married, that she dreams of grandchildren, and so on.Several times, she introduced me to her friends daughters.As a rule, it is overripe quite uninteresting cutesy girls who only dream to get married at least for someone.But they are my mother's opinion, and a modest home.
hundred times I tried to explain to my mom that I want to live independently in their own way: there is what I want, dress how I like to meet with those who are nice to me.She was crying, said she had no one, that she was alone, she loves me and wants the best.And I'm sorry it becomes, because it is true - it is - a lonely man, and her whole life is in me.
But even so it is impossible to live.I am very grateful to my mother for all that she has done for me, I love her and care about her, but there should be, and I have some kind of normal life ?!How to explain to her that it is high time to stop her vigilant vigil?How to reduce its intervention in my life?I do not want to hurt her or delete completely from life.But other mothers somehow understand that grown children should have its own life!And how do I make my mom understand this?