Children in the family : The art of being a parent

ideal parents do not happen as there are no perfect people, not to make mistakes.If there were somewhere perfect parents, they would have created ideal children who would, in turn, have brought up children of their own ideal.

But we, the people, the whole life learning through mistakes accomplishment, and even to the end of his life alo who can be called a truly wise.And what can we say about the 25-year-old mom, who only recently got out of youthful extremism, he lives mainly by emotions and desires, and her practical experience from the perspective of women, even forty years, and the experience can not be called.

And here is inexperienced, but physically flourishing creation gives birth to a child, and she was invited to become a perfect mother.As if she is far from ideal, and still only knows the price of right and wrong actions?So when psychologists warmed our negative emotions reports that as a child, they say, brought us wrong, they only emphasize a simple truth.It is impossible to impute.In goo

d, to bear and raise children should have after adding our own everyday experience, that is, after thirty years.

But nature decided so that a healthy child is guaranteed to be born to a young mother.Nature knows best.Only now it turns out that my mother does not teach a child's life, and learning to life together with him.So do not blame yourself for the mistakes in the upbringing.You have made them, because you - it is you.They are these errors, a reflection of your personality.And once these errors become a field of work for your own children.Therefore, he would be wise, who do not condemn their parents for what they were imperfect.

right to make a mistake, or a ticket into permissiveness?

But this does not mean that we should not work on themselves.Parents are obliged to strive not to make mistakes.Incidentally, this is a great way to overcome selfishness, because the less we think about themselves and their desires, and more eager to give the child what he needs, the wiser we become.

Note the word "need."Not that it seems to us desirable, is not that what we want to do for the child and what he needs.When a child becomes a teenager, it is very often the case that parents desire to have no relation to the child's needs.It is the eternal conflict of children and parents.

Therefore, the main task of the parents - is to help the child reach their potential and to teach him to live in this world.This dual problem, which does not necessarily imply "adventures" for all sorts of groups and sections, and use in the education of every conceivable teaching methods.Let's will not put the child experiments for their own self-assertion.

Contact - this is the main

pedagogical experiment - one of the most common mistakes today.Every parent wants his child to be unique, and pedagogy offers several systems for the development of this uniqueness.But the child - the individual.Do not play Pygmalion, for a start, try to comprehend this subject, to understand its potential, character and aspirations.

And this is possible only if you have contact with the child.And in this word the key to successful education.You must do everything that the child wanted to share with you their inner world.He must trust you, it shall be opened to you, and he should respect you.If there is trust, openness and respect for - the three pillars of pedagogy, you will be a good parent.

Such contact is established from an early age, and it is based on love, the usual maternal affection and self-oblivion.Do not think that at a young age does not matter.All the matter of habit.If the child at an early age accustomed to trust you and around you rely on, it will remain forever.