in modern couples comes a moment when it becomes clear that to continue the relationship does not make sense.Divorce can be initiated by both partners, or someone one - are more likely to leave the family man.If this happens, the woman is hard to imagine how to go through this stage in life.Psychologists say that the loss of a loved one as a result of the break in relations, is on the second place after the death of a close relative.To quickly return to normal life, it is important to understand the reasons that led to the divorce, and draw up an action plan.
Why women are very experienced divorce
is believed that women are much more difficult to go through a divorce, and this is no surprise - more than half of the cases, leaving the family's male partners.This is mainly due to the appearance of another woman, and this is a severe blow to self-esteem is already ex-wife.At first it will be difficult to keep yourself from comparison with that to which the husband has left in his head climb questions:
Divorce is difficult to survive even for the reason that I was not only the home situation (no one else is waiting at home after work when there are no children), and is formed almost entirely new imagelife.Common friends disappearing, perhaps a misunderstanding on the part of relatives.If you have a child, it is also experiencing a lot of stress.Often, the process of separation is accompanied by the scandal, which further spoil relations with the ex-husband.To divorce is not much impact on the psyche of children, the following steps need to make:
- Talk to your child.Explain why there was a divorce (but silent unpleasant details that put her husband in a bad light).Well, if you type the forces to hold a conversation with a son or daughter with a former partner, because the child is not to blame for your divorce - it is important to know that he is loved.
- not forbid her husband from seeing the child.No matter how strong resentment against the ex-spouse, a child grow better with his father, even they will see only intermittently.This will allow your children to avoid feelings of guilt, not create psychological problems.
- Do not use the children, trying to keep the relationship with her husband.Although divorce - it is painful, scary and sad, it is important to understand that this is the end.Maybe in the future, if you will work on the bugs, will be able to take a fresh look at each other, but that there are other people and other relationship.A child should not be a way to return to her husband after the divorce.
hardest to experience a divorce is necessary for women who genuinely loved their partner, family devoted all his time.For the fair sex the husband - is not only the person who brings the money, but the main pillar of support, a true friend.Psychologists have identified the reasons why women are going through a divorce is much stronger:
- priority for the majority of women - it is a family, then when men are more focused on moving up the career ladder.
- After her divorce from ex-wife comes great responsibility - the education of children.Almost all the process rests on her shoulders, it is difficult to combine with studies or work.
- ex-wives is much harder after her divorce from her husband to start life with a clean slate and a new relationship, especially if you have children.
Tips psychologists, how to survive a divorce from her husband
Experiencing severe pain, the woman at the time of the divorce and after it is sent to a psychologist.Experienced specialist gives the ex-wife of useful tips to help deal with the situation and to develop the right attitude.Together with the psychologist woman in a new way look at the situation, he analyzes the relationship with her husband, gets rid of negative thoughts and feelings.If you can not visit a professional in a divorce, you need to act autonomously, following the advice of a specialist.
The first thing that is recommended to make the psychologists - to forgive her ex-husband.For a woman who has just gone through a divorce, it can seem ridiculous.Sometimes the offense is so strong that has been simmering for years.But to forgive, at least after the first month alone, a must-try.According to statistics, women have kept friendly relations with ex-husband and managed to give him a pardon for care, more quickly recover, build a family and generally more successful those years can not get rid of unpleasant emotions in relation to a partner.
Get rid of negative
not so terrible period after the divorce, as the first night spent in the status of divorced women, and the first thing the next morning.It is extremely important for several days to be alone.It is advisable to call a knowing friend who will comfort and sustain your tears.Do not hold the emotion in itself: say what you think.Feel that close to you have a reliable friend, who came to the rescue.To make it easier to go through a divorce with her husband, the first time you will need reassurance from the side.Give yourself a few days in which to throw out the negative, and then pull yourself together and start a new life with a smile.
not keep emotions to yourself: communicate with relatives and friends
After the departure of her husband, women have the feeling of emptiness, loss and loneliness, because all the plans and dreams were associated with thisman.Especially hard for those who at the time of marriage had a child, because then make an effort to let go of the past is even more difficult.In the period after the divorce, you must not restrict communication, and vice versa - to try to make contact with loved ones, friends, friends, colleagues.It will be useful to visit the exhibition together and cinemas.This is necessary to prevent the occurrence of depression in parting with her husband.
Be confident in yourself
best way to add self-confidence - is to communicate with people who you positive attitude, make a stylish haircut, hair, beautiful makeup and arrange a photo session with a professional.Remember that divorce - not the end of life, but a way to ensure that arrange it on their own.Imagine how much you can achieve without ex-husband.Believe that the divorce - the best way for you.Remember the negative aspects of your relationship, write down the pros of free life after breaking up with her husband, feel relief from the break in relations.
Program yourself for happiness and a new relationship
Surviving divorce, it is important not program yourself that you will never be able to love so.Women leave her husband for many years part of the new relationship, because they feel the fear of repeated losses.This emotion is important to step back and leave.The reasons for divorce can be a lot, but, as a rule, people just do not fit together.If you did not work with this man, then there is the one whose character is perfectly in harmony with yours, who have the same goals in life, plans, who value family above all else.
Do not try to start a new relationship almost immediately after there was a divorce from her husband.Some advised to use it as a cure for hard feelings, but basically attempts to replace the former partner frivolous new acquaintances do not lead to anything but a strong disappointment.Allow yourself to flirtation, feel that you are attractive to the opposite sex, but do not try to immediately find a new love, do not rush to the first comer to the neck, to attend, after her divorce from her husband.
In addition, before building a relationship with a new partner, you have to change internally.Try to understand what went wrong in the marriage, what factors led to the divorce.I'm sorry, as a rule, not only ex-husband - both partners become catalysts scandals, misunderstanding, and as a consequence - the gap relations.After analyzing a failed marriage, you will be able to prevent such errors in the future, will become wiser.
Proven ways to return to the normal flow of life
- Throw all the old and unnecessary things.Surviving divorce, you should try to minimize the impact of negative factors on the psyche.One of them - it is jointly purchased or acquired by the little things (old concert tickets, or in the movies, books, souvenirs, magnets with the cities of travel, where you went together).No regrets throw away anything that reminds us of the former husband or give things to charity.You will be surprised how much easier it will live after the disappearance of these things.
- begin repairs in the house.A great way to get through this divorce from her husband - radically change the situation.To do this, not necessarily to move to another safe place (though this variant), the ideal would be to make repairs.For example, you can pokleit new wallpaper color, sew beautiful curtains, throw away the old and buy new furniture.If you do repairs in a divorce from her husband there is no opportunity, go and do general cleaning permutation.
- Change image and hairstyle.Old image that you had before the divorce from her husband, it is desirable to change.New haircut, solarium and beauty rooms will help you take a fresh look at yourself, give confidence.Time divorce - a good excuse to do them.To change the image even more dramatically, buy new clothes, see yourself in an unusual manner.If a divorce with her husband have a business style - buy romantic dresses, and vice versa.
- Buy yourself a pet.If your family with her husband had no children, it is difficult to stay on alone in the evenings.There is a solution - it is the purchase of a pet.Cheerful, kind and positive pet sincerely loves you, will survive the divorce.In addition, you can take an animal from a shelter, thus making it a truly good deed - it also will give a boost to the "recovery".
- Join a gym or dance.If you've been planning to do your own figure, now is the ideal time to enroll in a gym to improve their health, to work on attractive body.But remember that you do not do it for her ex-husband, that he "knew that he had lost."Motivation should be the other - a change, energy production, self-improvement.
- travel.Surviving divorce can help the journey.Remember the feeling with which you come back from a trip?It is a feeling of freshness, fullness forces in the head appear bright thoughts.A trip to another country or city - a great opportunity to quickly relive unpleasant parting.In addition, while at the resort, you can shamelessly flirt with men, increasing confidence in its appeal.
Video: how to adapt more easily after her divorce from her husband
Surviving divorce from her husband as quickly as possible and without any serious psychological consequences - the goal is to pursue the woman at parting.Leading the next video to share their experiences and advice with representatives of the fair sex, helping to cope with breaking family relationships.The woman insists that negative, difficult, painful emotions in the first few weeks (even months) - this is a normal reaction to the loss of your loved one.To make it easier to go through a divorce, see the recommendations of leading, about the behavior of divorcing women: